#BangaloreDiaries: Prelude.
"But! How are you going to wash your own clothes baba!?"
Two raised eyebrows directed the quintessential question with immense gravity towards me.
"Leave clothes, how are you going to manage your food? You’ve lost so much weight already. Na, eta hobe na (No! This can’t be)."
"It's going to be alright Maa, I will be fine. Your son has grown a beard; I'll figure things out. Please don’t make this tougher for me."
I hugged my mother tight enough to feel her tear drops on my shoulders.
I sighed and closed my eyes to darkness.
"Get up baba! You’ll miss your flight."
"It's going to be alright Maa, I will be fine. Your son has grown a beard; I'll figure things out. Please don’t make this tougher for me."
I hugged my mother tight enough to feel her tear drops on my shoulders.
I sighed and closed my eyes to darkness.
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| Ooooh, babe, ooooh, babe, ooooh, babe You'll always be a baby to me! |
***
"Get up baba! You’ll miss your flight."
There is a thing with how most Indian parents raise their 'kids'. For them, the concepts of ageing, evolution, maturity, adulthood et al cease to exist in context to their own children.
There is a subtle misunderstanding in the gestures parents want to do for you, and the ones they slightly overdo. I was about to turn twenty-five next month. I had sleep walked a quarter of a century within the cosy nest created by my extra loving parents. Something inside me echoed to break free.
Something urged me to take a leap of faith, to the unknown realms, to newer experiences, to embark a new journey.
Life was calling, and I couldn't resist answering.
A hoarse voice ringed near my ears and pulled away my blue sleeping bag. I hate to be woken up so abruptly. I looked at the wall clock. Unless a natural calamity comes knocking at our doors, there was no way I would miss the flight. I looked up and smiled. I did not want to fight or argue. I touched his feet and went to the washroom.
"I am plugging your phone to the charger. Have you kept the ticket's print out handy?
Oh and what about the cash I gave you yesterday? Have you kept it somewhere safe?”
I didn’t reply. He started knocking at the bathroom’s door.
“Did you sleep, AGAIN?”
I stared blankly at the pale-coloured wall. Random thoughts entering my head. I wanted to ease my tensed, over-thinking, over worrying parents but had no clue about bringing the change. Not that I detested their love and care for me. If not they, then who?
There had to be a way, I thought. Is escaping the only solution. I grinned.
I stepped out and lovingly glanced at my dad, who was sitting on his favourite couch, his face wearing one of his most pensive looks.
During most of our heated arguments, he would calmly say I would realise what he goes through when I father someone, some day. Parenthood is tough. So is separation.
The thing with getting attached to someone is, it starts feeling impossible to exit or alter the cohesive bonding’s that start leaving permanent imprints in your mind.
"You don’t have to worry about me all the time dad. Your teachings have prepared me well enough to face the world waiting outside. In fact, now is the time you should devote your energy solely towards your well-being!"
My farewell speech was filled with instructions for my folks. List of do's and do not's, that I had been mentally jotting for them. I wanted them to happy. I knew my mental satisfaction was directly proportional to their well-being.
The speech lasted long. It was delivered in pieces, at different locations, and was sprinkled with elements of love, sadness, humour, sarcasm, and a whole lotta love!
The moment finally arrived! My parents accompanied me to the airport an hour before my flight’s scheduled time. I had shut out my brain and was more focused at observing and grasping the parting moments. I decided not to get entrapped into thought loops and let the future unravel itself.
I waved my teary-eyed parents on the other side of the airport’s glass window.
There is a subtle misunderstanding in the gestures parents want to do for you, and the ones they slightly overdo. I was about to turn twenty-five next month. I had sleep walked a quarter of a century within the cosy nest created by my extra loving parents. Something inside me echoed to break free.
Something urged me to take a leap of faith, to the unknown realms, to newer experiences, to embark a new journey.
Life was calling, and I couldn't resist answering.
A hoarse voice ringed near my ears and pulled away my blue sleeping bag. I hate to be woken up so abruptly. I looked at the wall clock. Unless a natural calamity comes knocking at our doors, there was no way I would miss the flight. I looked up and smiled. I did not want to fight or argue. I touched his feet and went to the washroom.
"I am plugging your phone to the charger. Have you kept the ticket's print out handy?
Oh and what about the cash I gave you yesterday? Have you kept it somewhere safe?”
I didn’t reply. He started knocking at the bathroom’s door.
“Did you sleep, AGAIN?”
I stared blankly at the pale-coloured wall. Random thoughts entering my head. I wanted to ease my tensed, over-thinking, over worrying parents but had no clue about bringing the change. Not that I detested their love and care for me. If not they, then who?
There had to be a way, I thought. Is escaping the only solution. I grinned.
I stepped out and lovingly glanced at my dad, who was sitting on his favourite couch, his face wearing one of his most pensive looks.
During most of our heated arguments, he would calmly say I would realise what he goes through when I father someone, some day. Parenthood is tough. So is separation.
The thing with getting attached to someone is, it starts feeling impossible to exit or alter the cohesive bonding’s that start leaving permanent imprints in your mind.
"You don’t have to worry about me all the time dad. Your teachings have prepared me well enough to face the world waiting outside. In fact, now is the time you should devote your energy solely towards your well-being!"
My farewell speech was filled with instructions for my folks. List of do's and do not's, that I had been mentally jotting for them. I wanted them to happy. I knew my mental satisfaction was directly proportional to their well-being.
The speech lasted long. It was delivered in pieces, at different locations, and was sprinkled with elements of love, sadness, humour, sarcasm, and a whole lotta love!
The moment finally arrived! My parents accompanied me to the airport an hour before my flight’s scheduled time. I had shut out my brain and was more focused at observing and grasping the parting moments. I decided not to get entrapped into thought loops and let the future unravel itself.
I waved my teary-eyed parents on the other side of the airport’s glass window.
It was time to fly high!
 |
| And I've got a strong urge to fly, but I got nowhere to fly to! |
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